concentration

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Focus on each task with intensity as if it were a work of art.Concentration is a state of mind mastery where one can take a task or a moment and be immersed and involved in it without distraction. Concentration does not ignore others; rather, it is intense focus to achieve solutions, ideas, and finished products in the midst of daily life. Concentration is vital for our work, projects, aspirations, and the growth of our own souls.Suggested practices:

• Turn your phone off and or tablet/computer for 1 hour while doing a task to avoid distraction and to fully invest yourself.
• Commit to one day of technology free (phone, radio, television, computer, tablet) living in order to concentrate on spiritual, home, or other matters/tasks.
• Find something you have been avoiding doing and see it through to completion. Be fully engaged with whatever this is in all manner of detail{acp /top-intro}

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awareness

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Open eyes, open ears, open mind, open heart.Awareness is seeing and knowing what is happening in your locale, the world, and within yourself. It is a constant state of being connected to humanity, your soul and Hashem. Awareness breeds concern and helps to refine the other middot.Suggested practices:

• Try and notice 3 new things on your daily commute (sign, tree, house, etc…) that you haven’t noticed before.
• Become aware of your breathing when you are driving or performing tasks. Do you tend to hold your breath? Practice active awareness with your breath this week, being conscious of full breaths.
• Find a way to engage in a local event that you normally don’t attend so you can become more aware of your local community.{acp /top-intro}

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loving-kindness

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}We all need food, sleep, and love.Loving-kindness is acting out in loving and thoughtful ways to bring accord and friendship between those we do and don’t know. This type of living is other-centered and fosters harmony. In an overabundance of loving-kindness, we see excessive doting and lack of care for oneself; in an extreme lack of loving-kindness, we see selfishness and egotism rampant. This trait in balance serves humanity and self, and is considered a vital foundation of the world.Suggested practices:

• Show a smile to at least five people today that you pass by today.
• Lend an ear to someone that you know could use some company.
• Make it a point to ask someone how his/her day is going — whether you know that person or not.
• Give a genuine compliment to someone today.{acp /top-intro}

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moderation

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}The middle way frees one from the tyranny of cravings.Moderation is finding a balance in all things and is crucial in healthy living. Going overboard in anything is one way that this trait is imbalanced, while depriving oneself is another. By experiencing everything in moderate amounts, one can live more wholesomely and find true balance.Suggested practices:

• Identify something you do in excess and cut back.
• Is there something that you withhold for no good reason? Try integrating it into your life if it is good.
• Identify a passion. Take a break from it for a week.{acp /top-intro}

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enthusiasm

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Start and finish strong.Enthusiasm is approaching a task with zeal and the desire to accomplish it. It is vital in maintaining momentum in a productive and positive life. If one displays too much enthusiasm, it appears as obsessive and manic, while a complete lack of enthusiasm shows itself as listless and uninterested. Enthusiasm brought out in the right way is contagious and can be very inspirational to many.Suggested exercises:

• Enter into a difficult task earlier than planned and strive to complete itwith all your might.
• Enter a meeting with a cheerful and can-do attitude and maintain that demeanor throughout the meeting.
• Help someone with a difficult task by displaying a helpful and zealous attitude.
• Set your alarm clock 15 minutes earlier than normal and begin the day with an extra prayer or meditation. Spring into the day with anticipation.{acp /top-intro}

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gratitude

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Let life’s bounty cause you to whisper thanks with each breath.Gratitude is about expressing thanks and appreciation for all that happens and is given in life: planned or unplanned. Gratitude out of whack can manifest itself in two ways. Either we placate or puff up unnecessarily those who have given to us, or we fail to demonstrate gratefulness in any capacity. Gratitude in check is when we respond appropriately with thanks for the gifts and benefits we receive and do so in the proper capacity.Suggested exercises:

• Think of some positive aspects of your life today and express your gratitude and appreciation.
• Send a card to someone you know and express your gratitude and appreciation.
• Express your gratitude to a stranger who is serving you in some capacity today.
• After every meal this week, say a prayer of gratitude. This can either be a traditional blessing from the siddur or perhaps a heartfelt spontaneous prayer.{acp /top-intro}

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patience

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Endurance enlightens the mind and soul.Patience is a means not only to inner peace but outer peace. It is the ability to endure situations of all kinds and to remain level-headed. Patience out of balance can appear two ways. One extreme displays frustration, rage, and aggravation, while the other extreme displays apathy and indifference. Patience displayed in balance helps relationships and situations through rough spots and promotes healthy growthSuggested exercises:

• When you are in a situation and about to lose your temper, recite the memory phrase in your mind before you react.
• Plan to be early for all appointments this week and bring a book for the wait.
• When frustrated in traffic, have a favorite song handy for cue-up and enjoy the moment.
• If you are ready to lose your patience with a person, stop the seeds of impatience and say something kind to that person.{acp /top-intro}

{acp top-intro-old/} Memory verse: "When something bad happens to you and you did not have the power to avoid it, do not aggravate the situation even more through wasted grief." -- Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefesh"Consider it all joy, my brothers and sisters, when you fall into trials of any kind, for you know that the testing of your faith produces patience; and let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." -- James 1:2-4{acp /top-intro-old}{acp top-memory/}"When something bad happens to you and you did not have the power to avoid it, do not aggravate the situation even more through wasted grief." -- Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefesh{acp /top-memory}{acp top-long-def/}Just as copper holds its heat well, consistently and equally, so too do people who have patience.  They possess the strength control their heat, or their temper.  They are able to hold their emotions in check and handle stressful or unexpected situations.{acp /top-long-def}{acp top-image images/stories/middot/02-patience.jpg}{acp print-version print/W02-patience.pdf}{acp quotes-cat 242}{acp inspiration-cat 243}{acp meditation-cat 244}{acp torah-cat 245}{acp mesorah-cat 246}{acp besorah-cat 247}{acp daily-cat 248}{acp stories-cat 249}{acp accounting-cat 250}{acp podcast-cat 238}{acp _end}

silence

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Silence offers deeper engagement with the world.Silence is the ultimate purity in speech. By immersing ourselves in moments of silence (apart from technology and social interactions), we can begin to listen to greater things as Hashem speaks to us through our souls, minds, and hearts.Perfecting this trait allows one to know when to speak and when not to speak. When we exemplify silence so as to not commit lashon hara (evil speech), we are using our speech in the purest way possible. However, silence can also be a detriment if someone is counting on you to say something to uplift, defend or contribute. A perfect balance of this trait is using every word for higher reasons, not just to fill the air. Before you open your mouth, be silent and reflect: “What benefit will my speech bring to me or others?”Suggested practices:

• Say only positive words regarding a situation or person.
• Listen more than you speak this week.
• Practice being comfortable with silence in a conversation and don’t seek to fill the quiet spaces with awkward conversation.
• If a situation arises and someone or a group needs defense, do not be silent. Rather gently defend by commenting or speaking your truth to correct and bring honor. Do not be complicit.{acp /top-intro}

{acp top-intro-old/}"Before you open your mouth, be silent and reflect: 'What benefit will my speech bring me or others?'" --Rabbi M.M. Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefeshSilence is the ultimate purity in speech.  As the menorah in the Temple represented purity and brilliance, so too do we shine like a menorah when we guard our words.  When we exemplify silence so as to not commit lashon hara, we are using our speech in the purest way possible.  Before you open your mouth, be silent and reflect: "What benefit will my speech bring to me or others?"{acp /top-intro-old}{acp top-image images/stories/middot/10-silence.jpg}{acp print-version print/W10-silence.pdf}{acp daily-cat-intro-count 2}{acp quotes-cat 389}{acp meditation-cat 391}{acp torah-cat 392}{acp mesorah-cat 393}{acp besorah-cat 394}{acp daily-cat 395}{acp stories-cat 396}{acp accounting-cat 397}{acp podcast-cat 247}{acp _end} 

 

 "Before you open your mouth, be silent and reflect: 'What benefit will my speech bring me or others?'" --Rabbi M.M. Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefeshSilence is the ultimate purity in speech.  As the menorah in the Temple represented purity and brilliance, so too do we shine like a menorah when we guard our words.  When we exemplify silence so as to not commit lashon hara, we are using our speech in the purest way possible.   Before you open your mouth, be silent and reflect: "What benefit will my speech bring to me or others?"

humility

[middahsummarypage middah="humility" topintro='Between superior and nothing, I exist.Humility is about seeking a level playing field between all people. In displaying this trait, one does not seek to degrade or puff up oneself or others. Mashiach Yeshua says, “The greatest among you shall be to you as a servant. Everyone who lifts himself up will be brought low, but everyone who lowers himself will be lifted up.” (Matthew 23 : 11-12, DHE). Humility out of balance can appear two ways. One extreme displays haughtiness, while the other extreme displays groveling and self-deprecation. The obvious middle is where humility shines.Suggested exercises:

• In a conversation, focus intently on what the other person is saying and not on what you will say next.
• Practice active listening and talk less.
• Prefer someone’s needs over yours.
• When someone says something that does not agree with your opinion, considering holding your tongue and letting it go.

Memory Verse: "Always seek to learn wisdom from every man, to recognize your failings and correct them." --Rabbi M.M. Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefeshPeople who possess this trait are conscientious in their relationships with each other and in their demeanor.  They seek neither to degrade nor puff up those around them, nor think to highly or lowly or themselves.  Mashiach Yeshua plainly says, "The greatest among you shall be to you as a servant. Everyone who lifts himself up will be brought low, but everyone who lowers himself will be lifted up."  (Matthew 23 : 11-12, DHE).']

equanimity

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}I have control over only so much and I surrender to that.Equanimity is about having balance, level-headedness and calmness of spirit. It is approaching all situations and rising above them, realizing their temporary nature and working through them whether they be good or bad. Equanimity imbalanced can either appear as out of control and hysterical, or completely oblivious and apathetic. Achieving a middle ground of equanimity is ideal, as it is the means by which we can go from situation to situation with grace.Suggested exercises:

• When something challenging happens, quote the memory phrase before reacting.
• View a challenge as a test and score high by staying calm.
• React to an unpleasant situation by finding the positive in it and speaking it.{acp /top-intro}

{acp top-intro-old/}Memory verse: “Rise above the good and the bad for they are not worth disturbing your calmness of soul.” (Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin, Cheshbon haNefesh)Equanimity is balance, level-headedness and calmness of spirit. With this trait, we can rise above events — both bad and good.{acp /top-intro-old}{acp top-memory/}Memory verse: “Rise above the good and the bad for they are not worth disturbing your calmness of soul.” (Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin, Cheshbon haNefesh){acp /top-memory}{acp top-image images/stories/middot/01-equanimity.jpg}{acp print-version print/W01-equanimity.pdf}{acp quotes-cat 231}{acp inspiration-cat 232}{acp meditation-cat 233}{acp torah-cat 234}{acp mesorah-cat 235}{acp besorah-cat 236}{acp daily-cat 237}{acp stories-cat 238}{acp accounting-cat 239}{acp podcast-cat 237}{acp _end}

order

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}Strive for order gracefully and peaceably.Order gives structure to our days and environment so as to maximize our ability and effectiveness. However, order can be demonstrated in unhealthy ways. Order out of balance can either appear completely obsessive and neat to a fault, while on the other end of the spectrum a total lack of order appears as chaos and disarray. Those who embody order have actions, possessions and tasks all of an orderly nature – everything has a set place and a set time.Suggested exercises:

• Look at your daily routine and see if it is working; if not, change some part of your routine so it is more lifegiving.
• Take a room or space that is out of order and make a plan to organize it.
• Take an area or your life that needs discipline (health, fitness, prayer) and make a plan to make time for it.{acp /top-intro}

{acp top-intro-old/}Memory verse: "All your actions and possessions should be orderly -- each and every one in a set place and at a set time." -- Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefeshThose who possess order in their lives are a beacon to those around them.  This trait is also coupled with faithfulness and the ability to stay on task. Those who embody order have actions/tasks all of an orderly nature – everything has a set place and at a set time.  {acp /top-intro-old}{acp top-memory/}"All your actions and possessions should be orderly -- each and every one in a set place and at a set time." -- Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefesh {acp /top-memory} {acp top-long-def/}Those who possess order in their lives are a beacon to those around them.  This trait is also coupled with faithfulness and the ability to stay on task. Those who embody order have actions/tasks all of an orderly nature – everything has a set place and at a set time. {acp /top-long-def}{acp top-image images/stories/middot/03-order.jpg}{acp print-version print/W03-order.pdf}{acp daily-cat-intro-count 2}{acp middah-cat 252}{acp quotes-cat 253}{acp inspiration-cat 254}{acp meditation-cat 255}{acp torah-cat 256}{acp mesorah-cat 257}{acp besorah-cat 258}{acp daily-cat 259}{acp stories-cat 260}{acp accounting-cat 261}{acp podcast-cat 240}{acp _end}

decisiveness

{acp _pattern 248}{acp top-intro/}To decide is to affect change.Decisiveness requires one to act with sufficient forethought to make a decision with the best chance for success, but with willingness and readiness so as not to miss the opportunity.Suggested practices:

• Take some time to go through your closets/dressers/garage/basement and decide which items do not serve you anymore. Bring those items to a nearby donation store/drop-off point.
• Bring to mind a decision that you have been wavering on and contemplate/research all options and act.
• Create a plan for your week perhaps in meals, scheduling, budgeting your money, recreation, fitness, etc... See if planning and organization helps you in the area of decisiveness regarding this matter.
• Lay out an outline of a plan for the year and write down some steps on how you will decide to pursue that plan.{acp /top-intro}

{acp top-memory/} "All your actions should be preceded by deliberation; when you have reached a decision, act without hesitating." -- Rabbi Menachem Mendel Lefin of Satanov, Cheshbon HaNefesh{acp /top-memory}{acp top-long-def/}Mashiach Yeshua speaks against wavering and half-hearted observance . We need to learn how to be informed and courageous so that we are not indecisive - for this can cause others to go astray, missed opportunities or worse yet, tragedy.{acp /top-long-def}{acp top-image images/stories/middot/04-decisiveness.jpg}{acp print-version print/W04-decisiveness.pdf}{acp quotes-cat 281}{acp inspiration-cat 282}{acp meditation-cat 283}{acp torah-cat 284}{acp mesorah-cat 285}{acp besorah-cat 286}{acp daily-cat 287}{acp stories-cat 288}{acp accounting-cat 289}{acp podcast-cat 241}{acp _end}